After taking two Bodysex workshops with Betty and Carlin in New York, I really wanted to share the experience with a group of friends in Ohio. I figured this would give me valuable practice as I pursue my certification as a Bodysex facilitator.
I hosted a movie night and invited seven friends that were curious about my new passion. We watched Betty’s Bodysex Workshop DVD and talked about it. When I asked my friends who would like to join in a circle at my home with me as the facilitator, most were enthusiastic about participating. We set the date for a few weeks later and I began to prepare everything that we needed.
On March 5, three of us gathered together. What a tremendous experience for all of us! We began with sharing how we felt about our bodies and our orgasms. Although we knew one another before the workshop, revealing ourselves more deeply brought us together and ready for genital show and tell. I began by showing my pussy to the group. Amazingly, I felt comfortable in my role, sharing and describing the parts of my vulva. I sat reassuringly beside as each of the others took their turns. I felt so honored to share this intimate ritual with these remarkable women. We shared our vulva names: Kitty, Wonder Pussy, and Lauriebelle. Each of our pussies had a pillowy outer labia, and we agreed that we were grateful to have such pretty pillow pussies. I named our group the Pretty Pussy Posse. It was such a joyously positive moment. Then we viewed the video of Betty drawing the internal clitoris and I shared the internal clitoris model, anatomy diagrams and vulva drawings.
After a break, we came back into the circle We shared our various techniques for masturbation. Then we lubed up our barbells and intentionally inserted them into our vaginas while rhythmically squeezing and releasing. When fully inserted, we added the vibe and continued to practice the rock and roll method. It didn’t take long for us to become incredibly turned on, so we adjourned to erotic recess. As we settled into pursuing our own pleasure, the sound of orgasms erupted again and again. At some point, we all sat up for a break. I shared that I was fantasizing that we were all on the stage of a strip club, but instead of dancing and taking off our clothes, we were masturbating for an enthusiastic audience. After our break, we all decided to go for one more orgasm. Wonder Pussy came first with the rest of us quickly following her lead. It was intensely satisfying to orgasm together.
After a short rest, we recovered with group massage. Each of us were so relaxed and happy. We came back to the circle to share our final thoughts. We talked about ways that we could share group masturbation with other women in our community. I am confident that our small but mighty group will grow into more Bodysex circles in Ohio.
I feel so grateful for this extraordinary afternoon. Although I still have a lot to learn about facilitating Bodysex workshops, the power of the group guided the perfect experience for all of us. I have a deep connection with my two Bodysex sisters.
Behold the amazing clitoris! There is so much more than the shy little button under the hood. Officially called the glans, the visible clitoris has about 8,000 sensory nerve fibers. But there is so much more to the clitoral system. The glans is connected to the shaft of the internal clitoris, system of erectile tissue under the labia and hugging the vagina. The entire clitoral system has almost as much erectile tissue as a penis.
Watch Betty Dodson draw the internal clitoris as she describes the amazing internal clitoris and vulva.
I just finished watching Sticky: A (Self) Love Story and I had to share. The content of this documentary centers around our cultural relationship with masturbation. Although the majority of us admit to pleasuring ourselves sexually, it’s still a taboo topic of discussion. The film clips and interviews that comprise this film digs into why people feel so uncomfortable with masturbation in spite of it being something that most of us do. The humor included makes the film fun and easy to watch, yet it is though-provoking as well. It’s definitely worth checking out.
In a past life, I was an elementary school teacher. Then I retired and felt free to “go public” with my kinky sexual side. I found a wonderfully supportive community and made many new friends who are helping me grow into my true authentic self. What a gift!
A little more than a year ago, I was offered a part-time gig as an adjunct professor at a college, teaching future teachers. I accepted the position with excitement and anticipation of re-entering the comfortable world of education. But I quickly discovered that this role didn’t fit me any longer. Been there, done that. I was ready for something new.
I’m still a teacher at heart. That part felt right. But I no longer wanted to teach the content of my past. I needed to grow in a new direction. I decided that I wanted to teach about sex.
But how does someone become a sex educator? I started looking around on the internet. I found online degree programs and national organizations like ASSECT that could help me find a path.
Then I rediscovered DodsonandRoss.com Over twenty years ago, I found Betty Dodson’s book Sex for One on a bookstore shelf. My therapist at the time advised me to work on loving myself and I figured that included my sexual self too. Betty’s book helped me get back in touch with the joy of masturbation and orgasmic self-loving. Via her website, I learned that Betty is still teaching at age 87 and facilitates Bodysex groups in her own apartment in New York City. Even better, I could get certified by her as a Bodysex facilitator myself. From personal experience, I appreciated Betty’s work. Her philosophy and message was one that I could stand behind.
So I took a giant first step last May 2016 and participated in Betty’s Bodysex group. There were many gifts from that experience. Most importantly, I felt a deep awareness that becoming a Bodysex facilitator was the right path for me.
I spent the summer reading all of Betty’s books and exploring DodsonandRoss.com. I watched videos, listened to podcasts, and read blog posts. The more I learned, the more passionate I became about empowering women and liberating orgasms.
I decided that if I truly believed in female masturbation, I needed to bring it out of the closet in my own life. I started telling my vanilla and kinky friends that I want to become a sex educator and that I believe self-pleasuring is the key to improving our sex lives as women. Almost everyone was receptive to the information that I shared. Some women were ready for bite-sized pieces that are easier to digest and assimilate. Others couldn’t wait to experience genital show and tell or join in a circle jerk of women. The bottom line is that I learned there is a real need for this work of empowering women through masturbation.
“When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” I recently returned from my second Bodysex workshop with Betty and Carlin. This session was specifically for women that want to become certified as facilitators. Betty drafted us all to become soldiers in her orgasm army. I felt like I was sitting at the feet of a guru as Betty spoke. I learned so much while having a great time with my Bodysex sisters. My path to becoming a sex educator is a little more clearly defined. I’ve been given the green light by Betty and Carlin to start teaching and facilitating groups when I am ready. I feel rejuvenated and excited for this next chapter in my life. I hope someday that I’m the teacher for that student who is ready.
Sex toys are manufactured using all sorts of materials and some may be toxic and unsafe for your tender genital tissues.
True story. My partner and I were engaging in some anal play with a toy that we hadn’t used before. Almost immediately upon entry, I felt a burning sensation that intensified until I had to ask him to remove it. We made a joke of it and named the toy “Bernie.” I thought perhaps I hadn’t rinsed the toy enough after I had cleaned it before play, so we tried the toy again after another cleaning and a thorough rinse. I felt the same burning. We even tried it a third time in his ass (after a third cleaning) and he also felt the burn.
Last weekend, I attended a fantastic workshop “Junk for Your Junk: Sex Toys 101″presented by Chicago sex educators Sunny Megatron and Ken Melvoin-Berg. At one point, Sunny mentioned that some cheaper sex toys may contain toxic materials that will cause genital irritation and burning. My partner and I looked at each other with knowing recognition. Bernie!
Here’s a quick and easy tip to check sex toys for safety before risking irritation or a burning sensation. Lick the toy. If it tastes bad or burns your tongue, don’t put it near your sensitive genital areas unless you put a condom over it for some extra protection. Better yet, consider retiring the toy to the trash. Thanks Sunny Megatron for solving the mystery of Bernie!